So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I’m still trying to figure out how that could be.
— Charlie (Perks of Being a Wallflower)
broken but not destroyed
I’m not gonna explain much about what just happened, but it happened.
i had to end my relationship/friendship with Eric today. Certain events took place, shady stuff went on behind my back, and been lied to. right now I’m just trying to be okay. I’m not okay right now but I will be. I wrote a letter to Eric explaining everything and he graciously understood and apologized. I need to learn to be happy and content with my life without him in it. As much as this is going to kill me and be so painful I know its for the best. As I said before he will always be my best friend, but right now his actions are inexcusable. I will forgive, I wont forget, and I will move on.
Symptoms of a Panic Attack
- raging heartbeat
- difficulty breathing, feeling as though you ‘can’t get enough air
- terror that is almost paralyzing
- nervous, shaking, stress
- heart palpitation, feeling of dread
- dizziness, lightheadedness or nausea
- trembling, sweating, shaking
- choking, chest pains, distress
- fear, fright, afraid, anxious
- hot flashes, or sudden chills
- tingling in fingers or toes (‘pins and needles’)
- fearful that you’re going to go crazy or are about to die
the only persons actions i can control are my own.
the only persons actions i can control are my own
the only persons actions i can control are my own
breathe.
breathe.
breathe.
kinda sucks when you care for somebody so much and to be frank, they could care less.
ashlyn- this girl is amazing. she reminds me so much of kelly that its scary. all the summer nights of getting Mcdonalds and smashing on it, renting movies and falling asleep only to wake up at 6am and go home. all the walmart runs just for shits, watching scooby doo, walking aimlessly around the neighborhoods, sitting on your driveway with david and jason talking till 3am. we have the best friendship, i dont think ashlyn and i have ever gotten into a legitimate fight
reba- i havent seen this girl in forever but i love her. i’m thankful for her cause she made my senior year a one to remember. i love all of our crazy dance parties on top of cars during our off periods, listening to Jesse McCartney non stop, spilling Arizona Ice Tea through the halls of Pius, posting up pictures of GUCCI on bulletin boards, getting wasted in omaha before the faint…everything. i dont regret a thing with this girl.
janessa- even if we tend to disagree a lot and fight, i love her. she taught me alot in my highschool years, she taught me how to be champ, she taught me not to put up with anyone bullshit, she made me believe things will get better even when i thought they never would. we’ve laughed, we’ve cried. alot of ups and downs with our friendship but i wouldnt change it for the world. thats why i’m thankful for her.
